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Cake day: June 18th, 2024

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  • You ever seen an airtight toilet lid? That ain’t doing shit against aerosolized fecal particulates. Don’t worry though, no one’s gets sick just breathing the air in a bathroom, most public toilets in America don’t even have lids. If “fecal mist” was an actual health risk, the science would be well in by now, the patterns would be unavoidable and ubiquitous. Maybe if you lick the walls where the bathroom air condensates you might get sick, but most people are reasonable enough not to do that just by instinct.







  • If you serve the same person enough to know they always order extra ranch, bring extra ranch the first fucking time. If they ask for it, give it to them, if not, give it to the next one. As long as you didn’t put it on the table, it’s fine.

    All these hypothetical customers seem to be gladly paying for the extra sauce, idk what all the bitching is about. Servers live on tips, tips are frequently determined as a percentage of the bill, bigger bill, bigger tip. This is literally you as a server making more money, just get the damn ranch jesus christ


  • Most people know how much ranch they want

    If that were true, we wouldn’t be having this discussion. It’s impossible to know how much condiment you need when you haven’t seen the food portion size.

    most restaurants give about the same

    Experience has taught me otherwise. Most restaurants use the same-sized container for condiments, but you don’t know if you’re gonna get three ounces or half of one. Regardless, a table waiter complaining about waiting tables is not something that triggers my empathy.


  • Assuming you’re talking about waiting tables and not fast food, how do you expect people to know both how much ranch they’ll need and how much comes in a single order before seeing the food? Plus any decent server knows to check in shortly after the food comes out to see how first bites are, so it’s really not a wasted trip. There are plenty of reasons to bitch about restaurant customers but not knowing ahead of time exactly how much ranch they’re going to want is not really a very compelling one.